Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Heehee!

My grandmother's recipe. For some reason she would never let me lick the bowl.

Granny's Christmas Cake

Ingredients:
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
Lemon juice
4 large eggs
Nuts
1 bottle gin -Gilbeys London Dry
2 cups of dried fruit

Sample the gin to check temperature. Take a large bowl, check that the gin is maintaining the right temperature still, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level shot glass and sip it. Might as well finish the shot.Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the gin is still OK. The shot glass is empty. ust have evvaporated. Refill the damn thing. Just in Case. Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Pick the frigging fruit up off floor. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the gin to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. How's the gin doin'?. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window.. Finish the gin and wipe counter with the cat.



CHERRY MISTMAS!

2 comments:

Cristin said...

hahaha - have you made this yet? :)

Bret said...

I think Ashley was on LSD when she wrote this.